not have many positive solutions in mind, but these may
be the simplest answers to a tough problem.
Earplugs: Self-explanatory!
Noise-Canceling Earphones: They can be used to
listen to music without other sounds interfering; they
can also be used for pure, sweet silence. The good ones
are a little pricy – two or three hundred dollars. But
if they keep you sane, they are cheap at twice the
price!
White Noise Machine: If you hate things on or in
your ears, a white noise machine may be the answer. This
machine generates a “neutral”sound, like static on
television, that absorbs other sounds. Some people find
it very soothing!
Radio or CDs: Some people can fall asleep to
music; others can’t. You might be able to train yourself
to fall asleep to music over time, by experimenting with
type of music and volume levels.
Air Filter: This is my personal favorite, because
it also cleans the air, making it easier to fall asleep
because you’re breathing more comfortably! Make sure you
get one that makes noise – it will sound like the white
noise machine.
There is another solution,which I have used occasionally
with some success. My neighbors’ apartment is situated
so that, when they go out and leave their
incessantly-barking Papillon, he is stationed directly
over my bedrooom. He barks every second until they
return, but since they usually take him along, and since
I know that they adopted him from a rescue organization,
it’s not worth my time and energy to fight them. Even if
they tried to train him not to bark, this little dog was
severely neglected as a puppy; he’s probably not going
to improve. So I did the unthinkable; I slept in the
living-room! You can’t hear the barking from the other
side of my apartment, the futon and couch are
comfortable enough, and it was kind of fun in the way
that building a fort in the backyard was when we were
kids. If the idea of changing your sleeping venue
doesn’t chafe you, sleep someplace else!
If you’ve tried the easy solutions and they haven’t
worked, it’s time to move on to new strategies.We all
know the accepted wisdom about stopping your neighbor’s
dog from barking.You go to your neighbor, present your
complaint calmly and ask him solve the problem. If
Leave It to Beaver is anything to go by, your
neighbor will blush, offer you cake and coffee, and
immediately shut the dog up for good. In the event that
your neighbor tells you to go to hell and slams the
door, you now have a barking dog and a neighbor who
hates you. Let’s go through a few possible scenarios, so
you can pick out the one that fits your situation best.
We’ve discussed the LITB (Leave It to Beaver) scenario:
the next-best one is that your neighbor really does feel
bad –the dog is driving him crazy too! And he wants to
solve the problem, is motivated to train the dog, but
doesn’t exactly know how. You can refer him to this
book! If you really like him, you can buy him the book
(or loan him your copy), and even help work with the
dog. All this scenario takes is patience on your part;
although if you aren’t sure which way your neighbor will
go when you approach him, there are a couple of things
you can do to optimize the situation. Before you start
this list, if you already know your neighbor and he’s a
Nazi or a gun-freak or a dope-addict or a wife-beater,
don’t put yourself at risk by trying to make nice. Just
skip directly to Step #8. If you don’t know your
neighbor, contribute to world peace by giving him the
benefit of the doubt.
Start a journal. Write down the date and time of the
barking whenever you notice it. When you talk to your
neighbor, write down the date and the general way the
conversation went. You’re practicing prevention measure
for if things go awry and you later want to take a
journal to court. Don’t skip this step! It’s a
pain in the ass, and hopefully you’ll never need it, but
if you do, you’ll certainly be glad you have it. Courts
love people who bring in facts; names, dates and
relevant details. If you do ever have to go to court, we
want you to win.
Cool down. If you go over there mad, you’ll be shooting
yourself in the foot by putting your neighbor on the
defensive. Go over there with the plan to be really
nice, like June Cleaver. If he’s a jerk to you you’ll
have plenty of time to be hateful later.
If you and your neighbor aren’t already acquainted,
don’t put a lot of stress on your name or address. In
fact, see if you can say something like, “Hi! I’m Jean,
and I live a couple of houses over...” (waving vaguely
in the wrong direction). Ideally, so he won’t hear your
last name until you can be somewhat sure he won’t look
you up in the phone book and mail you a dead catfish.
Bring cookies. Or beer, but only if you know he’s a
beer-drinker (check out his recycling bin for his
favorite beverages). I know, he should be the one
buying you bribes. Let’s agree that life is truly
unfair, and move on with what might actually work in
your private war on noise. With people as with dogs, a
treat goes a long way towards smoothing feelings and
working towards a happy outcome for everyone. When you
give him cookies, you are training your neighbor to
quieten his dog!
Smile and be friendly. (Did I mention that?)
Only state your problem once and be specific. If the dog
barks all day but you don’t care except between 10 PM
and 7 AM , ask your neighbor if there’s a way to solve
the problem during those hours. Don’t ask for more than
you need: you may just overwhelm him. Let other
neighbors contact him if they want different quiet
hours.
Offer to help. Say, “I know this great e-book on how to
teach your dog to stop barking. Would you like the URL?”
And if you really like dogs, offer to help train or walk
the offending dog while your neighbor’s out. Obviously,
don’t offer more than you’re willing to give, in case he
takes you up on it. Now you’re not just being friendly,
you’re establishing that you are willing to go out of
your way to help your neighbor meet his obligation as a
pet-owner. If he doesn’t meet you half-way, he’s going
to know he’s a jerk, and so will anyone else who takes
part in the situation if it escalates.
Assume a best outcome until your neighbor indicates
otherwise.
If your neighbor isn’t responding to your friendly,
cookie-laden persuasion, you don’t need to threaten him
or start a fight. Don’t even bother to tell him that
you’re going to file a complaint with the city (although
that’s what you’re going to do).Leave as gracefully as
possible and start working on the legal remedies
available to you. If your neighbor’s dog is barking
within 25 feet of your yard, buy an ultrasonic
dog-bark-stopper, read the directions and install it
carefully. If this solves your problem, throw a big
party! If the dog is barking near another neighbor, take
what’s left of the cookies over there and form a
alliance whereby you will purchase and install the
device in his yard. If these solutions don’t work, read
on.
If you live in a complex or condo association, good
managers will address pet problems between neighbors by
contacting the offending neighbor themselves. Some will
investigate the complaint so that instead of just
saying, “your neighbor says”, they can say with
first-hand knowledge, “Your dog is barking every day
between noon and 6 PM.” Some cowardly, lazy, bad
managers will try to tell you that it’s your problem,
but they’re avoiding their duty to keep the place
noise-free. In that situation, you’re probably screwed
as far as the managers go, although in some places you
can take them to court for failing to provide for your
right to quiet enjoyment of the premises, and in some
places they can be made to pay you money for your loss.
But that completely depends on the housing
regulations in your county,so don’t try to force the
issue with your landlords unless and until you know you
can win. (Don’t forget to document your discussions and
save your dated and signed correspondence with your
landlords too. Doas much as you can in writing and make
copies so you have solid pieces of evidence that you
tried and tried to resolve the problem.And no matter how
mad you are, make sure only to write down things that
won’t backfire on you in court!)
By the time we get to this step, we are assuming you
have tried to make nice and have failed due to your
neighbor being a jerk. We are also assuming you’ve
logged all your interactions with your neighbor and the
days and times the dog has been barking. This is when
keeping a journal starts to pay off for you. Call your
local animal shelter or the non-emergency police line to
find out what agency takes and follows up on complaints.
Towns have different rules and complaint procedures;
find out the particulars and set about your business.
Some people give up at this point, because it’s a
hassle. Some places make you show up in person; others
have special forms to complete. Be persistent and
patient. Some towns investigate after a first complaint,
but many others wait until three complaints have been
lodged.
Sometimes you can do everything right and everything
fails. This is an ugly fact of life. Landlords and
judges can be unfair: entire neighborhoods can be
composed of endlessly-barking dogs. Do everything you
can, but once you’ve done it all, it may be time to sigh
deeply and move on. But first, read this book thoroughly
and try everything!
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